Holy f...I suck so much at talking to people. Frig, I thought I might be able to keep myself from blogging until at least the afternoon, but no, here I am again at 1:45am writing random thoughts that come out of my tired brain. !!! Argh! Why do I suck so much...if anyone can give me a reason why I must be the worst person ever, I'd really like to know. E-mail me or something, cuz god knows I can't talk on the phone to save my life. Yeah I suppose you're all wondering why I hate myself so much right now...I guess it's because I've hit THAT mark in my relationship. THAT STUPID MARK!!! It always screws me over...why can't I just move past that f'ing mark and get straight to the good stuff?? Yeah, I suppose I've confused you enough for now, so I might as well explain myself. As alot of my close friends know, I happen to be the most crazily insecure person on the entire planet. I win first place in that category *accepts medal and takes bow* thank you, thank you. But yeah...as I was talking about before, I hit that point in my realtionship where it's too early to know what's going to happen in the future, but too late to turn back on anything. So being the insecure person I am, it's pretty brutal when you have NO idea what's going to happen. I can feel an anxiety(however you spell it?) attack coming on. Yeah, that mark hates me, it always will...it always comes along about 3 weeks into a relationship, once I get past 1 month I'm fine, but anything after 3 weeks always kills me. In case you havn't noticed, my previous relationships have all been either less than 3 weeks, or more than 3 months, there's no middle ground for me. I guess that's why I'm freaking out. Plus the fact that I think I just screwed myself over with Dave, agh! Sorry for the lack of funniness in the post...I left my humour in my bedroom and I'm too tired to go get it. See, what did I tell you? Geez, kill me now.
- posted by Eddie @ 1:55 AM